He's my friend! The rinse and repeat excuse used by Celebrity Pastors.

Boy oh BOY is there a huge BREW ha ha over Mark Driscoll, and Janet Mefferd recently.

It reminds me of the gaslighting that victims get when they approach the church about the abuse in their homes.  You know what I mean…it never really happened.  It was all in your mind.  You just want to be mad, etc.  We see nothing, and you are making a big deal out of nothing.  NOTHING here to see!

He is my friend!

Mark was to be interviewed about his new book, and he was called on some publishing errors that Janet saw.  He first attempted the pollyanna response (He is my friend, and I love him, etc.) that is common with celebrity pastors, and then Janet Mefferd pushed harder.  He answered again with a hint that maybe she needs to hush with a snark about how he should have taken notes during dinnertime with the author…and footnoted it for Janet Mefferd.  She was firm, but nice and drove the point home again -  he wasn’t having it.  He did the ‘biblical’ drill, and she is just being nasty by continuing the conversation.

Mark to me is trying to be the ‘cool’ pastor on the block, and he seems to have quite a following.  He is more what I was term a Celebrity Pastor, and he seems to feel at times his opinion is best presented with the LOUD factor.

Yet, in this interview with Janet Mefferd?  I’m sorry it reminded me of the old Southern Belle approach of how he just doesn’t understand what she wants from him today….we suppose to talk about my BOOK after all.  I told you he is my friend, and I love him…and if I had small error in my footnote – I say to my friend ‘sorry’.  Driscoll is no Southern Belle, and he got called out on it – drop the platitudes and answer the question.  Mark objected and got nasty because she didn’t go with the ‘biblical’ game that celebrity pastors use when they get busted.

Today if you have a pastor that is popular in some circles, and he is complementarian?  They seem to include him in their little ‘inner’ circle.  They promote themselves in the other’s conferences, promote each other’s books, and generally parrot the old ‘he is a Godly man’ deal.  You have to admit their marketing is working.

Mark Driscoll is accused of plagiarism. His inner circle is more upset over her being ‘rude’ to him.  Oh boy!

Prior to my edits here on 12/7/13 - Janet Mefferd has taken down some of the material about this case.
Ingrid Schlueter Resigns From Janet Mefferd Show Over Mark Driscoll Plagiarism Controversy

Fallout From Radio Show Host's Allegations That Pastor Mark Driscoll Plagiarized Includes Deletion, Apology and Producer's Resignation

Although it is not clear why Mefferd removed her content regarding the accusations against Driscoll or whether she was pressured, the Christian Post learned that Tyndale House has some sort of media partnership with Salem Radio Network and Mefferd's radio show is a member of Salem National, a subsidiary of Salem Communications Corporation.

So some of the links below have been removed by the author.

Other Examples of, “He is my friend”

Problem is when one of the celebrity pastors fall?  They tend to circle the wagons, and go in for the kill towards the accuser.  I have to tell you I caught the business when I posted John Piper on Youtube when he spoke on Desiring God, “Does a woman submit to abuse.”  Now keep in mind the website stated you could copy the material to share, and that is what I did on youtube along with my opinion’s of his viewpoint on my blog.  Well that video took on a life of its own, and to this day he still refuses to admit that what he said was awful and dangerous.  I no doubt didn’t take the junk that Janet Mefferd is taking from the Mark Driscroll crowd, but I can sure empathize with her position.

They did the same thing when it came to CJ Mahaney, and the sexual abuse circus that went on within his network of churches.  They all love him, and don’t believe a word of it – since they are ‘friends’ and all that don’t you know.  Throw in a couple of  “Godly” this, and “Biblical” that and everything is all better now.  I mean when some of the cases were thrown out because of the statue of limitations (took to long to come to trial) that means the cases had no merit – according to the celebrity pastors.  Your suppose to believe that now!  Yet, that isn’t entirely true is it?!

Celebrity Pastors seem to get a couple of passes they certainly shouldn’t be getting.   I guess they seem to feel if one falls the rest will fall like a house of cards?

Anyway, here is the start of the timeline:

She is a journalist, and she did need to ask about the lack of ‘piety’ he showed at John MacArthur’s Strange Fire by crashing it to give out his ‘newest’ book.  When he was asked to leave?  He tweets that they confiscated his books, and yet they have video of him offering them UP as a gift to the church.  Creating that type of ‘buzz’ isn’t generally considered proper, or above board.  He attempts to skate past all that.  Its an inner circle deal, and your suppose to overlook it.

Mark got a pass on the Strange Fire behavior in the interview as far as I’m concerned. No doubt he was a bit embarrassed by his childish behavior, especially when he was there to speak at a ‘Act Like Men’ conference on the other part of town. (giggles) Think about that for a moment huh?

Janet Mefferd Interviews Mark Driscoll

The interview was going nicely until the alleged plagiarism came up.  As I said the pollyanna approach was attempted, and he snaps back by telling her she is being grumpy, accusatory, and not Christlike when the approach was rejected.  I realize it was uncomfortable for him, but he does preach how you are to be humble in response to error.  He blew that.

I mean how dare her hold his feet the to fire like that?  I had to roll my eyes at the “I love you as a sister in Christ’ speech as well.  Please.  Seriously?  He was to busy telling her he dines with the gentleman that his material sounds like, and how he is a good friend of his.  That doesn’t answer the questions, but I guess it should. 

Then it happened…. The end of the interview to ME at least sounded like a call drop.  You know how cell phones are.  I didn’t take it as a hangup myself.  .

Well – insert drama here – did he hang up or didn’t he?  A second audio of the interview surfaced to show that he didn’t.  The second audio to me seemed a bit fishy, because the audio quality is different.  The seconds that pass of silence was different as well.   His publishing house (Tyndale) came back with a rebuke of Mefferd after listening to a recording supplied by Mark Driscoll of the interview.  They apparently didn’t like her tone (which others didn’t either), and stated that the book correctly footnoted Mark’s source.  Janet supplied screenshots of the material in question. It certainly doesn’t look like he footnoted by the lawful standardized practice, but I’m no lawyer.

Notice!  Janet is clear as a bell as she is in the studio on the first version (video above), but on the second version of the interview ending she sounds like she is also on the cell phone.  It clearly isn’t the same recording at all.  Did Mark hit his mute button by mistake while he was also recording the interview?  Who knows, and quite frankly who cares. 

It wasn’t the big issue anyway.  Yet, you wouldn’t think so by the buzz all over the place.  I saw it as a diversion from the bigger issues.  It was all about how Mark was treated rudely, and accused of hanging up on the interview when he didn’t.  WELL at least from his ‘circle the wagons’ friends.  I still don’t really know what happened there, but something did.  If you look at the comment section of Spiritual Sounding Board you will see ‘tweets’ from the inner circle telling others not to do interviews anymore with Janet Mefferd.

Own it, Correct it, and Move ON!  Friendship doesn’t cut it!

I have had to deal with my share of media in the past due to a business officer position I held once upon a time.  We had the media hounding us over a personnel issue, and we couldn’t discuss it contractually.  The person was charismatic, and we got loads of phone calls about it.  Yet, we had to handle it some how.  We had some drama as well, and you need to stay calm, direct and to the point. In our circumstance everything was above board, and we would have LOVED to include the parts that we legally couldn’t. 

If you are asked questions again – like Driscoll was?  You rinse and repeat your response.  I guess my point here is if a everyday person can do this on occasion?  Driscoll in his position he really has no excuse.  He just doesn’t.  The Pollyanna approach isn’t what was needed here, and it sounds like the alleged actions may not be so above board.  Is that why he relied on friendship in this case?  I don’t know.

If the alleged plagiarism was indeed an error, and it was overlooked?  You shut the interview down right away by admitting it.  You rinse and repeat your response as needed.  You can do it in a way without having your pants sued off, and he knows it.  You should have heard repentance (if he felt there was a possibility of error)…and you heard defensiveness and he is my friend (which has nothing to do with it). 

You sound sincere and firm, because mistakes happen.  The last thing you do is get defensive, and give this impression on how dare you attempt to take authority over ME.  For goodness sakes you sound fishy, and up to something when you do that.  You try to act all ‘street wise’ preacher guy the rest of the time!  Legally? They should care less if the man is your friend, and you had dinner with him…and all that jazz.  It wouldn’t hold up!

Janet did a follow up, because of the backlash. 

Janet Talks about what happened with Mark Driscoll

Honestly?  If Mark Driscoll was a man of integrity he would stop the wagons that circled him, and say, “Your right!  I acted like a Jerk.  I’m sorry.”  Then you finish it up like you should.  Being called on a alleged crime – 14 pages of material after all – is pretty serious.  If it was dumb mistake why not admit it?  Is there a lack of faith in forgiveness? 

Quite frankly, admitting the error to me it would go far.  He acted like he was above all that, and no one is…not even a celebrity pastor.  Friendship doesn’t apply in their circumstances.  He did attempt to admit it, but also ended it by making excuses for himself.  That is why he got additional questions from her.  He tried to wiggle out of it. 

He has an out here he could use – blame the FLU!  We all get grumpy when we don’t feel good.  Save face and use it for goodness sakes!

Yesterday Janet Mefferd spoke for the last time for now about this issue, and also posted online screenshots of the material in question.  She also added to the list where he alleged plagiarized in another book.  The publishing houses will not return her calls or emails.  You can listen to how she has been treated since this time, and how she has uncovered the possible reasons WHY the publishing houses are refusing to talk to her.  Big surprise…Money!

I know my readers have felt ‘gaslighted’ when they have approached their churches about the abuse that is going on in their homes.  If anything this circumstance should validate your life experiences in a way.  Mark was trying to pussy foot around this interview, and she was strong enough to not let him.  Most in you in your circumstance – at the time anyway – were NOT strong enough to do what Janet did.  Your too beaten down by life, and sadly that is what they count on.  Well in my opinion anyway.  The bigger issue?  We shouldn’t have play those games. 

Does ‘He is my friend’ work?

Will this circumstance blow over?  In my experience due to their status – it will.  I hope Janet Mefferd doesn’t let go of this, and she shouldn’t. When you look close enough it all comes down to cash.  The cash they make from these celebrity pastors, and how they are investing in publishing the cash cows in the future. The alleged source material he plagiarized?  He took it from the inner circle, and they won’t push it legally.  That’s the reality of it.  Remember they cover for each other, and this practice may magically stop or disappear in future printing of the books in question.  They will not go as far as admitting any wrong doing.  The publishing houses will cover their behinds as well.

No.  Its not us – its them.  It’s the lofty and haughty attitudes that know so much better without even giving the consideration of a true listening ear.  The muscle of the machine will make the circumstances disappear, and the diversions will belittle the reality of it.  They are ‘friends’ after all.

They seem truly afraid to be held accountable, and sadly tend to stick together like some high school clic.  Sigh.

Other points of view:

Janet Mefferd  She speaks again about this after the Scott Walker interview – about the 19 minute mark.
Mark Driscoll and Janet Mefferd: Plagiarism, Tribalism and Paganism
Plagiarism? Examine for Yourself
If the Top Men take over, who will ask the hard questions?
Janet Mefferd presents documentation of Mark Driscoll's work to work by Peter Jones and Don Carson

Act Like "Gentle" Men PLEASE!

Matthew 7:¹⁵ “Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves. ¹⁶ By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? ¹⁷ Likewise, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. ¹⁸ A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit.¹⁹ Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. ²⁰ Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.

Join the Church and Get a Set of Knifes

Well it seems we had two popular ‘conferences’ to choose from in California this week. 

 

Pastor John MacArthur has his Strange Fire Conference.

 

Strange Fire is a conference that will set forth what the Bible really says about the Holy Spirit, and how that squares with the charismatic movement. We’re going to address in a biblical, straightforward manner what many today see as a peripheral issue. On the contrary, your view of the Holy Spirit influences your relationship with God, your personal holiness, and your commitment to the church and evangelism.

 

Then you have the Mark Driscoll and James MacDonald running their “Act Like Men” Conference.

 

Men who are loud and ruthless about their own sin, but patient and full of grace in leading others. Men who long to follow God without limits and meet the needs of those around them without hesitation.

To get there we need radical surgery. It's time to cut deep and get it all, and not be afraid of what that means. We challenge you to join thousands of men for a two-day conference this fall-to step up with us and Act Like Men.

 

What happened to acting like GENTLE men?

 

We have seen in the past when one pastor’s don’t like something another pastor believes, preaches, teaches, etc.  They can be either a gentleman about it, or sadly as we have what we have  seen this week – a petulant child.  Mark Driscoll gets the petulant child award this week!

 

No doubt neither of them agreed with the ‘others’ message this week, but holy mackerel you would think some could ‘act’ the role they get paid for.  You know – pastor, teacher, leader, etc?!

 

Mark Driscoll’s behavior to me doesn’t show other’s how to ‘Act Like Men’.  He tweets ahead of time that he planned to go to John MacArthur’s event to ‘hand out his newest book’ which doesn’t agree with the MacArthur’s main message for his conference.

 

Yes, we know that celebrities at times ‘tweet’ that they will be places where others can meet them.  Pastor’s tweeting that they plan to come to the opposing event to hand out his books ‘opposing’ message?  That’s not my vision of someone that wants others to ‘Act Like Men’.  Establishments normally welcome celebrities and ‘twitter’ followers because it helps their bottom line, and gives them promotion.

 

Some how I don’t think The Strange Fire Conference took it that way.  It doesn’t take ‘discernment’ to figure out WHY either!

 

As most of us know – or could understand if you didn’t – vendors are normally vetted at these events.  The approved vendors then can hand out their literature, and sell their wears, etc.  This is pretty common practice for a host of reasons.

 

I guess Mark Driscoll and James MacDonald decided to ‘Act Like Men’ and crash the event to hand out Mark’s latest book  - and of course ‘autograph’ them if need be.  They were approached, and asked to stop.  Security it seems offered to walk him and his books back to his car.  Yes, the vendor ‘vetting’ portion that no doubt Driscoll and MacDonald knew  about – as I’m sure they have the same process – was explained to them.

 

To me, I can understand you being offended by the MacArthur’s conferences message.  People do that have right, and you can ‘agree’ with MacArthur’s view as well.  Different belief systems aren’t going away anytime SOON!  For me personally? I think they are both a bit screwy!

 

Crashing an event like this is not what a gentleman would do.  You don’t ‘tweet’ your maybe arrival if you have time, and act like WILL wonders ever cease  - when asked to leave due to actions you KNEW would push buttons. 

 

(giggles) I mean can you imagine what the response would be if a feminist group or gay pride group showed up at the ‘Act Like Men’ conference?  Yikers! 

 

James MacDonald didn’t like how some people showed up at his event – and they paid for the tickets and travel – only to be escorted out, and threatened with arrest.   Yet, Mature and Acting Like Men MacDonald and Driscoll didn’t see a problem crashing someone else’s event while NOT paying for the tickets and travel.  Okay then.  They can pick and choose who is at their event, and BE MEN while crashing someone else’s.  Sigh.

 

Yes, Driscoll acted as if he showed up to ‘bless them’ with his new book.  (Yeah right!) They were his GIFT to them, and he showed up with boxes FULL of them.  When he was finally escorted to his car?  Mark Driscoll to let everyone know that the books were a ‘gift’ to the church location where the event was taking place.

 

Next thing you know he wanted to show others how to ‘Act Like Men’ once again, and tweets that security at the event confiscated his books.  I guess he missed the part that plenty of others were around when he announced ‘his gift’, and they were rather upset when they were accused of ‘confiscation’ instead.  Check out the screen shot of responses on Twitter over that:  Driscoll Claims Confiscation of his Books

 

Yep, they know how to Act Like Men don’t they? NOT!

 

That Strange Fire he felt was NOT the symbol of Real Men.  Teenage boys going out to crash a party MAYBE …. but then most of those boys GROW UP! 

 

Comment I had to smile at: Sort of funny, really to watch this…. They both agree that the earth is flat, but can’t agree on whether it rests on the backs of seven elephants, or an endless stack of turtles. Utterly delusional. Both.

 

Mark Driscoll 'Crashes' John MacArthur's Strange Fire Conference? (PHOTOS)

 

Mike Riccardi, the local outreach pastor at Grace Community Church Speaks of what he saw

Now you get 'juice bars and skinny jeans’ at church. Seriously? That’s all you heard?

The church claims they hear the Millennial generation, but are they listening?  They haven’t been listening for generations now!  Sadly, they just think they are.

I’m NOT a millennial, but I would be guilty of the generation that gave birth to them.  Yet, I can understand their complaints.  Our generation raised complaints, and we were ignored and spoken down to as well. 

I realize some of the older generation – like mine – will throw out the stereotype about the generations ‘issues’.  WELL all generations had them, and some young people walk away from church….and come back when children are born. 

Once they leave again after that?  Chances are pretty good its not over all the labels or issues that the present generation is handed.  Its normally MUCH larger than that.  To me?  That’s where they miss the boat…

Things have been going downhill since the 1980’s – if not sooner.  I guess its our children’s chance to have a running start, and bang into that brick wall now. 

Acknowledge and Deal with the Changes in Culture

When you don’t listen to the millennial generation’s parents?  You can be pretty much secure in knowing their children will figure it out as well.  Problems don’t go away when you ignore them, but tend to get worse.

The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim release to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to let the oppressed go free, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.

In the present culture you have the internet, and in my generation you had the start of cable tv (when I was teen I believe).  Our worlds were starting to open up, and come to find all the messages you told us about being the ONLY one that felt that way?  Hmm.  I guess NOT so much!  That’s why we are questioning you….

Your words had power when we were isolated, but now that the world as opened up?  We find others that realize some of the things you say don’t make sense either. 

For me personally at times the church’s viewpoint was almost superstitious. You need to keep sheltered, because otherwise you will be contaminated.  That doesn’t say much for our strength in faith.

You have to act a certain way, dress a certain, worship a certain way…so as we see it the church created an environment at times that made people compelled to hide sin.  You can’t show that ‘contaminated’ side.   If you point that out?  We were told this church attitude isn’t there, and we are seeing things or making things up so we can sin.  It’s a smoke screen!

What is Masculine?

I was reading a discussion recently about masculinity.   I guess I shouldn’t have been so surprised as to what some felt the term consisted of. 

As much as the church tries to tell you to stay away from worldly concepts?  It seems the traits of masculinity have indeed been poisoned by culture.

You at times get this impression of the burly man that is career driven to support his family.  He will be a sportsman on the side, and go out of his way to show strength more in the physical manner than anything.  He is the top dog that just oozes manly man, and people just rush to respect and honor.  He will use his inner courage to stand firm against the world, because he is gatekeeper for his family.  The image we get from most sources is not so approachable.

You almost have to stand back, and wonder HOW do you approach such a person?


We concentrate so much on actions or behaviors in the sense of gender, and yet to me its more about character.  The character of the person is more important than some masculine trait that some church leader claims you should have.  Masculine traits are cultural.  One person’s view of masculinity may not be the view of another.

I remember a video of Mark Driscoll taking a questions from his congregation.  One comment was about circumstances of a stay at home father.   He immediately emasculates the man, and then asks his wife to basically back him up.  Which she did by saying she couldn’t respect a man that doesn’t support his family.

Strange how pastors can break that cardinal rule of not doing something to emasculates a man isn’t it?

Income to a family is important don’t get me wrong!  If you have a family in which income is being taken care of by the woman, and its agreed upon?  Who is Driscoll to say it is sin?  I’m sorry but ‘supporting a family’ is so much more than income.  It’s sad that so many people are so closed minded that they can’t see that.  What one family may need may not be what another family may need in the form of support of the family.  Support should be seen by the circumstances.

Proverbs 28:⁶ Better the poor whose walk is blameless than the rich whose ways are perverse.

This is a character trait, and not something that is based in a cultural role.   It’s a virtue of the person.  Support as the definition seen by the Driscoll’s example maybe hard to accomplish by people that are poor income wise.  The person’s walk is what God looks to.  There are plenty of families that go hungry and are homeless.   Their character and their integrity are not bruised just by this circumstance.  Read Proverbs again!

Are Females Equal in Dignity, or the 'source' of derogatory terms?

Definition of DEROGATORY

1: detracting from the character or standing of something —often used with to, towards, or of

2: expressive of a low opinion : disparaging <derogatory remarks>

 Male and female were created by God as equal in dignity, value, essence and human nature, but also distinct in role whereby the male was given the responsibility of loving authority over the female, and the female was to offer willing, glad-hearted and submissive assistance to the man. - CBMW

feminization of the Church

feminization of Leadership

feminization of males

feminized male temperament

feminization of the social order

feminized male temperament

feminization of manhood

feminization of our homes and institutions

feminization of church leadership

feminization of deity

 For some reason today it seems acceptable to use the female, feminization, feminist, etc as a derogatory term, and yet its pretty acceptable to also state that women are: equal in dignity, value, essence and human nature...

Why does this sense to people?  Do we show the equality in dignity, value and essence of women when we use feminine words to describe what is wrong with the world?  Its used in a derogatory way, and yet we are accept that we are seen with dignity, value and essence. This should not be.

We heard about 'gender confusion', but the way they describe it at times?  It sounds like Androgyny. To the secular world gender confusion would mean more about sexual orientation.  Androgyny in very simplistic terms is: a person who does not fit cleanly into the typical masculine and feminine gender roles of their society.

The truth is there are times that people don't cleanly fit into what society says is strict gender roles.  Lets take a man that can be sensitive at times.  According to today's theories that is because they got 'chick a fied' (Driscoll).  From what I see they take the term sensitive, and overuse the characteristics of that word into what seems a 'drama fied' presentation of their own justification instead.

Here is a example of what I'm talking about:

The sensitive man represents a cultural attempt, then, to correct John Wayne masculinity. Where his father or grandfather never wept, never talked much, never said "I love you", the sensitive male weeps readily, chatters away, and reassures anyone within earshot of his love. In seeking an emotionally alive masculinity the sensitive man seems to have sped past "properly balanced emotional life" and landed in the once-foreign land of "traditionally feminine ways of speaking and feeling".  CBMW

 Then to make sure they don't want to tell you being 'sensitive' isn't all together WRONG:

Men of the Bible are by no means silent or unemotional. The father of the prodigal son, for example, weeps openly and deservedly when his son returns home (see Luke 15:11-32). Christ Himself wept when He heard of Lazarus's death (John 11:35). Christ was compassionate, tender, gentle, and merciful throughout the course of His ministry. So we ought to be a balance of strength and gentleness, not either/or.  CBMW

What we seem to miss is that not all women are characterized as: weeps readily, chatters away, and reassures anyone within earshot of her love.

I know I don't see myself like that, so am I 'dude a fied'? Did I buy into the masculinist movement?  Is that a masculinization of females?  Do I have a masculinized female temperament?  OH I KNOW I'LL BE - MACHO FIED!  That sounds so much better doesn't it?

Although that might sound derogatory...

Most parents would tell their children NOT to tell their male friend  that he throws like a girl.  How it will hurt their feelings, and because its cruel.  We all know how it is used, and what it means to a boy to be told this.  We see it used all the time, and yet as a woman I'm not to feel 'less than' because females traits are being used as a cut down.

It would make about as much sense if they choose to pick on Red hair.  Red Hair is awesome, Red hair is honorable....Add in all their superficial praises here.  Then use the red hair as a derogatory cut down to another person, because its 'culturally cool'.  THEN turn around and tell the person they love next to them with red hair, and repeat the mandra:  Red hair is honorable, Red hair is awesome....

Those rules about calling a male a female seem to have changed ONCE you become an adult.  I wonder how they explain that to their children? I mean now it is totally acceptable to tell them they are acting like a female.  What seems confusing is God honors females, but its okay to use culturally 'female' traits to attack men.  Yet, that isn't because they don't honor females.  Why does that make sense?

Their Conclusion:  We need to realize women are equal in worth, dignity, etc but SON we do need to use the 'feminine' characteristics to show the world WHAT is wrong with these men!  THEY act like all a bunch of WOMEN!

For some reason its okay to use those derogatory terms to hurt the feelings of men, and at the same time show women by the use of such derogatory female terms also means no disrespect to women. 

In the end?  There really should be no confusion!

Seriously?  I personally feel its insulting.

Dogma without mercy is Hollow

Dogmatic Practices of the Church

I was reading an article about how Anne Rice stated on Facebook that she has quit Christianity.  There were those that yes got bent out of shape over it, but I wanted to read more about her decision before making up my mind.

There are more people than the church will admit that think they can use a 'tune up' so to speak.  They oppose the use of dogma with no mercy because it is hollow.

The LATimes had an interview with her, and the tag line to this article did strike a cord with me. 

The novelist says she still believes in God, but she couldn't find a basis in Scripture for some positions taken by churches. (She is referencing the dogma of the church)

There are straws that break the camels back with people.  I have heard from people that wish to leave over the issue of domestic violence, and how the church just can't seem to deal with it at all logically.

What Anne Rice seems to be talking about is the Dogma.

People will claim over and over that people leave the church, because they can't handle what scripture is saying.  Yet if you get deep down into it?  Its the question of the dogma more than scripture.

She mentioned that she had already accepted the stand on homosexuality prior to going back to the Catholic church, and yet to often you read THIS is the reason she left!  I have to admit that portion has to be hard on her, since her children were gay.

What people don't look into is that she stepped further than that.  They look at the gay factor, and then just DROP IT!

How DARE you approach to Domestic Violence in the church!

There was a discussion on Mark Driscoll recently, and they posted his message to abusive men.  I remember the first time I heard it, and I had just dealt with a family going through a very hard time.  He said some things that I wanted to say, and I felt some of the rage he was feeling as he screamed, "HOW DARE YOU!".

It was the human part inside of me over the hurt and anger I felt over a family being terribly mistreated.  I was very UPSET over their abuser's entitled mindset over how he was justified.  I was seething over how he could find fault in everyone and everything, and not once did he step up to the plate with his own sin.

Abusive people (not just men) are great at blaming everything and anything for this behavior.  They are not capable of owning things, because it makes them feel 'less than'.  It makes them feel powerless, and it makes them vulnerable.  They look at it like some opening that people are waiting for so they can charge it to crush them into the ground.  What they don't realize?  Most people aren't interested in that, and yet that is HOW they view the world and the people within it.  Remember how I always say they tend to do things with motive?  They assume everyone does that!

You see from time to time when they will admit certain things, but if you stopped long enough to listen?  They always have a BUT attached.  There is always justification.  There is always some hurt or reason for their actions.  What they never offer up is ownership of their own poop, and yet demand it from others in a very threatening way.  They will say they have a bad temper, and yet when you get into the nuts and bolts of that aspect?  Their anger stops all conversation.  You may be able to speak of it one day, and yet the next time HOW DARE YOU!