Church Leaders that Hide the Truth are Cowards! Can we admit that?

We all know that churches – or shall we say more directly HUMANS make mistakes.  It happens, because we all have screwed up royally at times.  Church leadership isn’t immune.  For me its how they handle their mistakes that show their fruit.    Then you have times in which tragedy hits, and if they make mistakes hiding the tragedy instead of facing it?  It’s hard to wrap you head around WHY they refuse to face the truth.  The more they bounce around?  The more trust they break along the way.

 

We have a saying that goes, ‘The larger they are the harder they fall’. 

 

Today when we look at large congregations in trouble?  It also depends on how they handle that fall, because if they handle it badly?  They don’t just fall hard…they tend to bounce. 

 

The more they bounce along they are also asking others to endure one hard fall after another.

 

I think we have all experienced that in life.  We blew it in some way, and when the time came to face our error….we hid it instead.  We may have been scared of the consequences, or just wanted to get away with it.  We may have told just part of the story, and were hesitate to share the entire circumstance.

 

Then before we know it we get nailed with a full out wrath that tends to be worse than if we had just LAID out our sin the way we were suppose to in the beginning.  Most individuals tend to give all up at that point, because its clear to them the truth is out.  There is no denying it.  Its scary, and its hard but its time to let it all go.

 

It seems lately we have very LARGE organizations within the faith bouncing all over the place by choice.  Now realize I’m not saying ‘literally’ by choice, and I guess the better way to phase that is bouncing due to ‘choices’.  Okay, YES I guess I was right the first time….they bounce by choice.

 

They have some ugly, awful thing happen within their congregation.  They wait until they HAVE to say something, and then they choose to say as little as possible.  They fall hard, and then BOUNCE up with business as usual. 

 

Then another piece comes out, and they fall hard once again and BOUNCE up once again.  The circumstances tends to settle in, and more comes to light.  BOUNCE! BOUNCE! BOUNCE! 

 

Keep in mind its not different types of sin that surfaced, but the same one that they attempted to silence to begin with.  What’s even harder to understand is the people that back up their decision to go down this silly path to begin with.

 

You normally hear all these excuses about how they had to weight what was appropriate to share, and when they needed share it.  You would think the first or second time they BOUNCED they would have realized its time to lay it all out there. 

 

They have a hard time admitting that they break that bond of trust they have within their congregation each and every time they decide to bounce instead of just falling…and then slowly getting up to learn from their mistake.

 

It’s rather scary for me to realize that these leaders are really true cowards at heart.  They are quick to preach what the bible says, and refuse to learn a darn thing themselves.  Yes, that is part of the reason they are called Pharisees.

 

When you read the bible during those times in which Jesus got truly upset with the sin of others?   It was normally directed towards the religious leaders at the time.   

 

They got so consumed with their power, prestige, and role within the community.  They had all the answers, and they expected people to fall into line when it came to what they had to say.  All that power in a sense went to their heads, and not their hearts. 

 

They lost the essence of their position, because they wanted to LEAD not GUIDE.  They got more out of sin sniffing, because they knew they were almost immune from it themselves.  If people questioned that part?  They had their own personal thugs (they call supporters) waiting for their time to tear you apart for not doing as you were told.

 

I have known many truly decent pastors in my lifetime.  They also had some hard circumstances come their way, and they were the first to admit how agonizing it was.  Hiding these things just wasn’t within their character.  They looked to themselves, their church policies, and everything else under the sun to see HOW this failure could have happened.  They wanted to be sure it could never happen again.  They wanted everyone else to watch for it as well!

 

They were the ones that were quick to take the blame, and really own it.  They knew their position, and they felt the responsibility.  They mourned with those that mourned, and along with that asked for forgiveness.  I think most of us realize unless they did the sin themselves it wasn’t ultimately their responsibility, but none the less they owned it.  They will be the first to admit they dropped the ball somewhere, and they will point it out…and take their lumps that comes along with it.  Notice they aren’t the ones that need the thugs – errrr ‘supporters’ either!  At least not in the same way the bouncing ball pastors do!

 

I would say that most people respond to that type of leadership, because we have all lived similar circumstances yet in different ways.  We can empathize with it if nothing else.  That is the firm foundation of being able to grow past it.  The foundation was firm because there was no bombshell waiting to be the next earthquake to smash it to pieces.

 

We always struggle with HOW on earth these men in leadership can allow themselves to keep bouncing like a ball, instead of just facing things that God would have them face.  I look at the attitude that we clearly see today that was spoken of in scripture so long ago: ⁴² Yet at the same time many even among the leaders believed in him. But because of the Pharisees they would not openly acknowledge their faith for fear they would be put out of the synagogue; ⁴³ for they loved human praise more than praise from God.

Here is the entire passage:

 

John 12:37-43

³⁷ Even after Jesus had performed so many signs in their presence, they still would not believe in him. ³⁸ This was to fulfill the word of Isaiah the prophet:

“Lord, who has believed our message
and to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed?”^[a]

³⁹ For this reason they could not believe, because, as Isaiah says elsewhere:

⁴⁰ “He has blinded their eyes
and hardened their hearts,
so they can neither see with their eyes,
nor understand with their hearts,
nor turn—and I would heal them.”^[b]

⁴¹ Isaiah said this because he saw Jesus’ glory and spoke about him.

⁴² Yet at the same time many even among the leaders believed in him. But because of the Pharisees they would not openly acknowledge their faith for fear they would be put out of the synagogue; ⁴³ for they loved human praise more than praise from God.

 

Tragedy will always hit churches at one time or another.  Its how we handle this that shows our true faith in God.  The truth will help the survival of the church, and hiding things just tears at the organization’s foundation.   No doubt everywhere you go you will find the ‘yes men’, and they will hide things even knowing the truth.  A leader with integrity will not allow the errors the church made be hidden, because they know God will find a way to heal them.

 

Yes, that is the harder road to travel.  Isn’t that what we hear preached all the time anyway?

 

When they hide things, and allow their churches to bounce, bounce and bounce again?  To me it shows they just don’t get it, and honestly shouldn’t be in the position within the church.  It’s bad enough having the deal with the sin all by itself, but breaking the bond of trust towards the position by hiding things?  It makes things worse.  The eyes are blind, their hearts are hardened. 

 

Then you have those that know better, and would rather play the supporters for these cowards then speak for truth themselves.  Both the leadership and their thugs will be the first to attack anyone that questions their way of doing business.  They also encourage others to do the same. 

 

What the church doesn’t see is with each bounce they ask members to endure they lose trust, and members leave silently.  Secrets kill churches, and individuals faith.

 

It’s not an easy place to stand up against that type of force, but it is God’s way.  At times you lose your place of worship, friends, family, and even your own position. 

 

Truth isn’t always a very easy place to stand with.  Gods asks us to anyway.  He has a plan, and we must have faith enough to wait on him.  He has a plan even when we may not see one.  Truth is what sets us free, and a church that plays a bouncing ball just isn’t.

 

C. J. Mahaney Leaves Leadership of Sovereign Grace Ministries

Prestonwood Baptist Doesn't Call the Cops on the Molester, But They Call the Cops on the Church Member Who Asks Questions About the Molester

PSA: Penitent Pedophiles and CrossWay Community Church (SGM)-Graphic

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The Importance of Reporting Abuse in a Religious Setting (especially if you attended Bob Jones U)

When men have to be Lords and women subservient, THIS can happen

Is this the model of manhood?

What is it about decision making that makes people so insecure?

 

Recently on Equality Central there was a discussion about a men’s conference in which part of the focus was the outright contempt for feminism.  The author mentioned that the speaker, Voddie Baucham had geared up this popular target of contempt to the point that SOME men actually acted out against it.  (Or did they actually act out what Voddie was preaching?) Due to the fact it was a men’s conference, and it sounded like had a huge audience they also opened up the women’s bathrooms for breaks for the men in attendance.   Paul  Doshe, the blogger in question not only wrote online about had huge issues with the doctrine that was being taught, but the fact that some men felt the need to urinate all over the women’s restroom after hearing about the dreaded ‘man haters’.  We are not talking normal misses that happen – especially with older men – but puddles.  Keep in mind the author was speaking about his own personal observations. 

 

Unfortunately, Paul was asked to meet with some of the church leaders about his article on the conference.  It ended up resulting in a phone call to the pastor, and the author issued an apology for not submitting his views on the conference to that pastor prior to publication.   Paul also made the decision to remove his opinion piece, but at that point I had already saved a copy for today’s discussion and have preserved it online.  Personally?  We don’t need a pastor’s permission slip for opinions and personal observations.  When a pastor wants to play the ‘forgiveness’ game, and manipulate it in a way that you may question your salvation?  Its insecurity talking – not decision making.  It’s a common tactic.   The old:  You must ask my forgiveness for the offense, and I will forgive you (on my terms). 

 

The pastor missed the bigger picture.

 

The pastor would discuss the small part of Paul’s article speaking about the ‘puddles’, but refused to speak about the problematic distortions of doctrine Paul was taking issue with.   Paul mentioned the pastor forgave him after he asked for his forgiveness over the conflict of his opinion of the conference. 

 

The first thought I had was if this was a glowing review there would have been no phone call, no asking and receiving of forgiveness.  No permission slip needed. 

 

Church Image or Doctrine

 

Dr. Voddie Baucham spoke at the conference about culture wars – a popular topic – and yet it seems the culture of ‘church image’ never entered this pastor’s mind and heart.  The church and the conference had an image to uphold, and that sadly was first and foremost in this pastor’s mind.

 

The pride issue came to mind also, because it seems since this pastor made the author feel in some way the need to apologize for his observations.  The man’s overall take of the conference – and the bigger issues at hand – were not worth spending time on.   Yes, the thought of the author caving also crossed my mind.

 

Paul recently put up a final opinion piece in which he felt he did the right thing by removing his views, and how he feels ‘caving’ wasn’t the issue.  It does sound like he felt convicted to remove the original piece, but the way his addendum was replaced shortly after removal concerned me.  After some time dwelling on this I figured he placed addendum up before truly thinking it out completely and clearly.  Sigh – I can relate to that myself!

 

The actions of the pastor shows the contradictions that this doctrine pushes a person to conclude. 

 

We hear all the time on how people should approach men with a aspect of respect and honor.  I guess that part is only reserved for wives and children.  Men on Men doesn’t count.  I wonder if they asked themselves if Jesus would agree with that?!  Voddie stated in his sermon at the conference to model behavior for others, but again that must only be for ‘certain’ others.

 

Compassion towards Paul doesn’t seem to register with this pastor either.  Clearly, Paul’s doctrinal issues were more important than certain men acting in a immature way in the women’s bathroom.  The image of these men, the bathroom, the church, Voddie and the conference were much more important to the pastor.  Remember these types are the first to remind people that people allow their ‘emotions’ to run this lives, and are quick to remind you that ‘feelings’ in this sense are unreliable.  Is that only for women and children?  I mean the pastor that hosted the event’s emotions clearly overtook him.

 

The thought of the Shepherd leaving his flock to find the one lost sheep comes to mind. The pastor seems to be telling the world, ‘Hey!  We fed him didn’t we!”

 

It seems that not only do women have a hard time getting answers from these types, but men do also.  That is not surprising to me, but it seems to contradict their entire message of the conference they led.  Is this a good example of their Discipleship & Education?  I guess it wouldn’t be the first time a pastor held a conference of this type, but decided he didn’t need to heed the message of the conference his own church is marketing.  Pretty sad state of affairs.

 

It reminds of the dynamic that Al Miles speaks about when it comes to him speaking at churches about domestic violence.  He is invited all over the country to give presentations of domestic violence, but sadly it was the pastors of those churches that wouldn’t be in attendance.  He made a future policy that he would only lead the conference if they – the pastors of the church - agreed to be there.  Sounds like Voddie needs to do the same thing.

 

Voddie’s Culture Wars – Always a popular Topic!

 

Voddie had some good things to say, but he also had some rather far out opinions as well. 

 

For example, he would speak about how husbands and fathers need to truly be involved with family life.  They have to be more than ‘airport dads’.  An airport dad is a man that comes home from work, and sits on the sofa to watch television or read his paper.  Mom is running around pretty much doing everything else in life.  His paycheck is nearly his entire contribution to his family.  He states later that some men more identify themselves by their job titles.  He gave an example of how ‘work life’ had to take a back seat to his home life.  He then showed how most families do the opposite.  For instance, if work needs something family must take a second seat, and how it should be the opposite.

 

Whether it be mom or dad I will agree the above to be true.

 

Most of Voddie’s views on feminism are not based in fact.  He used Gloria Steinem as an example of a ‘man hater’, and later mentioned how women just a notch up the food change to the serpent in the Garden of Eden.  I doubt very much he watched the documentary of Gloria (click the link to watch it) – in her own words as it was called recently on HBO.  They showed clips from her past, and also more recent interviews.  They actually address the ‘man hater’ and ‘gender sameness’ junk we hear about all the time.  Sadly, it seems Dr. Baucham was misinformed in a number of areas.

 

There is a myth that we believe.
There is a myth that we promote, and this myth is that feminism grew because men stepped away from their roles.

Man stopped being who and what they were supposed to be, and so feminism grew as a result of that.  Folks that is so incredibly naïve!

Feminism is actually a a reaction to strong manhood. It's not a reaction to weak manhood. Feminism is rebellion against strong manhood.

The feminist movement did not….when you talk about modern feminist movement most people do not realize the feminist movement goes way back to the 1800s.  When you talk about the modern feminist movement you talk about people like Gloria Steinem and people like this from the 1960s.

BUT even then these people were not saying men are stepping up and being men. No! They are saying we hate men!

- statement from Voddie Baucham at the conference in question

 

I guess for some the cliché is true about if you repeat myths enough times its truth to some.  Strange practice coming from a Pastor I must say.  The Bible states how we are to love our enemies, and pray for them.  I don’t understand how this campaign of contempt against feminism can EVER come across as anything but contempt when they use generalizations, myths and dare I say lies against others.  When common sense is used actions speak louder than words, and I pray that most don’t model that behavior.  I will add that even if it WERE true, the contempt still would NOT be justified.

 

The mocking of men and women isn’t uplifting, and using that to shepherd others (which Voddie taught at the Conference) is far from encouraging.  YES, I did listen to his message to understand where Paul was coming from (i.e.: harsh aspects of the message). 

 

In one example, Dr. Baucham spoke about an example of man that came to him because he didn’t approve of his daughter's choice for a future spouse.   Dr. Baucham asked him what his daughter said when he spoke to her about this, and the man replied that he and his daughter didn’t have much of a relationship.  You then got to hear about how this man expected Baucham to ‘fix this’ for him.    I doubt that is what the man said, but that is what the Dr. took from the conversation.  Dr. Baucham continued on what he must have felt was a humorous rant about how this man was an awful father, and what the heck did he expect HIM to do about his circumstance.

Pastor I need your help!

Why?

Well because my daughter came back with a really really really bad candidate, and I have no idea what to do!

Well sit down and talk to your daughter.

I really don't have a relationship with my daughter.
So I was hoping that maybe you could - I don't know - maybe you as a minster 's could help?

Really what did you prepare your daughter to look for?

Yeah well we really didn't talk about that.

Okay, let me see if I get this right:
You don't have a relationship with your daughter.
You didn't prepare her for what to look for.
She came back with somebody you disapprove of, and now you want somebody else to fix the mess that you made!
In other words you just said to me:

Pastor I just planted in Apple tree in my backyard now apples are starting to grow on it. Can you help me with that?

(giggles)

You can't say amen you can only say OUCH!

(giggles)

-Transcript from  Voddie at conference

Ouch if Voddie Baucham feels this shows strong manhood! I hope his story was hot air, and he did offer the man more than what he mentioned.  He came to him for advice, and not a list of cut downs.  Jesus would have us be honest but showed compassion as well.  In a broken world this broken man needed something besides being the brunt of jokes for his presentation.

 

Dr. Baucham does very well with his presentation skills, but the message at times was far from edifying.   It creates a ‘us against them’ mentality.  Yes, the bible does say in Romans 12:2:

Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

 

No offense but ridicule is of the world, and we see it all the time in books, articles, television, radio, politics, power struggles etc.  We can speak of broken people, and their broken relationships without being cruel about it.  Although he did have some good things to say he also came across as the school yard bully in other ways.    This culture loves to use ridicule, and seeing a pastor use it also takes so much away from anything good he may want to convey.  Its not a hard jump to mention NOT good modeling behavior.  He could do so much better.

 

Don’t be insecure in your decision making

 

The audios from the conference are online.   I have downloaded some of them so they don’t disappear online after a while as well.  I will post them soon.

 

The blogger Paul mentioned Romans 16:17

And now I make one more appeal, my dear brothers and sisters. Watch out for people who cause divisions and upset people's faith by teaching things contrary to what you have been taught. Stay away from them.

 

God isn’t asking for the ‘us against them’ attitude from his people.  That does not show his love for this world, and for his creation.   Awful Fathers, Dreadful Feminists, men that leave puddles of urine in bathrooms for others to clean up, and YES even the pastor of the church and Dr. Bauchman himself are all sinners and in need of grace.  We would be nothing if it were not for Jesus.  The thought of that should humble us all.

 

Audio Programs like this conference tend to disappear due to insecurity.  Manipulating, and asking for a public apology from a blogger that is not warranted is as well.  The pastor from this church modeled that behavior for us – showing he is more concerned with image then he was about the hard edge of the teachings at the conference.  No, I don’t think that was what you (men who attended) should have gleamed from the conference.  Your not suppose to talk about that though, but most especially DON’T talk about the urine puddles.

 

Additional Articles I found regarding this conference:

 

Complementarianism, Scapegoats, and New Meaning to the “Fountain” at Bellefontaine

Pulpit condoning

Complementarian men symbolically urinate on women

Complementarian men symbolically urinate on women

To give an account and to intercede for their wives

Shirley Taylor over at Baptist women for equality had an article this morning about Advent. The article title did make me sigh a little bit!

 

Should women be looking for the Christ child, or a husband?

 

Towards the end of her article she had mentioned Cindy Kunsman, and educational program that Cindy had presented in 2008.

Cindy Kunsman can tell you that Baptist seminarians believe it. At a conference in 2008 at a Southern Baptist Seminary, Cindy says “Several young men asked how it was that I believed that they would not stand before God…to give an account and to intercede for their wives….These (young men) were Baptist Seminary Students.” (ethicsdaily.com April 2008).

Cindy’s video is very interesting, and I learned a lot!  She hits on all kinds of areas of beliefs regarding Patriarchy.  When she mentioned some teachings from representatives from the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood, Federal Vision,  and Southern Baptist Theological Seminary?  They pretty much threw a hissie fit, and claimed she offered ‘misinformed accusations’.  Did they pony up with the evidence, or actually point out the errors in question?  Nope.  Funny how that happens isn’t it?

 

This belief about how husbands are accountable for their wives and children's actions before God is crazy talk! We are asked to love and care for another. We aren’t asked to be held responsible to intercede, give an account or be responsible for another in this fashion.

 

When you face God its between you and him. It won’t matter if you were a popular pastor, head of the seminary, dutiful wife, wonderful mother, etc. He isn’t interested your office or role. Gender doesn’t give you leverage!

 

When I read things like this I truly feel badly for the men and women that are taught these things. It’s a very heavy burden if it were true for them, and being that humans can be selfish? No humanly incentive for women to do their best. It’s a teaching that states we don’t need Jesus, but a good husband to give account and intercede for us.

 

No offense, but they need to find another seminary.