Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Lack of Modesty is NOT a reason for rape!

Posted by Hannah at 10:27 PM

If you can't see video click here!

I was flipping the channels on television last night, and I came upon a discussion about rape and modesty.  I'm all for modesty, because the Lord calls for it AT the very least okay?

When you make excuses for rape due to lack of modesty?  I have an issue there.  The argument may make sense on how our culture sees things, but its also based in ignorance. Its one of those things in which the 'world' and the 'faith' circles tend to agree, and they shouldn't.

Rapist's to me look for the vulnerable.

Rapist's look for the opportunity.

Rapist look to see what circumstances are best to be able to get away with their crime with the least amount of personal risk.

They are like any other criminal in that sense.

Rape can happen to either gender, and that honestly should be clue one it has nothing to do with 'modesty'.

I mean how often do we ask little boys if they were dressing provocatively when they were attacked?   If the dress is the key - it would be universal.

It has to do with a demented mindset, and nothing else.

You have a man or a women with a sick mindset, and they hunt for their victims.  REMEMBER men aren't the only ones that attack sexually!

They search for the opportunity, and they seek the vulnerable typically. It's that way with most any other crime as well.   If a criminal is going to rob a house?  Are they going to pick the one with a huge dog, and security sign on the window?  Or the one that is dark, and shows easy access?

When criminals break in a house, and rape and kill the people that lived there?   Its very telling for our society that they can realize that happened due to the power structure at the time, and that the criminals were CRIMINALS!

Yet we make excuses for rape in other circumstances.  How convenient is our intelligence when we have to face things up close and personal, and yet throw it away when the opportunity presents itself.

Does the dress mean success?

I remember reading up on Ebay before selling some of the children's clothes for hints on how to be successful, and someone mentioned that used shoes and socks are a real turn on to some.  I honestly had no idea until that point that some felt feet were a huge fetish.

Can you imagine what most would think if a rapist came back, and said but their shoes, socks, or feet turned me on - and I just couldn't help myself?  Are we next going to accuse people of footwear being to much next?

Rapist have their own fetish, and it is far more dangerous than buying used socks and shoes on Ebay.

I think we all realize there are people that dress to get the wrong kind of attention.  Some feel that is the only way to find love.  There is nothing wrong with dressing modestly.  Stating your dress makes you less vulnerable to rape?

Lets look at circumstances here for a minute!

First of all you must have a rapist in your midst.  They are looking for the next victim.  If it will help you - think of the music from the Jaws movie here for a moment when the shark was coming in for the kill!

You have a group of people dressed to attract attention, and you have a sole person dressed modestly.

You have a person dressed sexy but also is well aware of their surroundings, and is seen carrying something in their hand on her way to her car - compared to a person dressed perfectly fine and walking around without a care in the world.

The rapist is going to look at all of them, and decide WHICH will be the easier one to take down.  Jaws is thinking to himself WHICH will be the easier snack!

They are already on the hunt, which means they don't need anyone to 'turn them on' - they are there already.  They are looking for opportunity to strike, and get the deed done with the least amount of risk to them.

Would it be easier to take down the single modestly dressed women - or a sexy dressed one in a group?

Would it be easier to take down the 'slut' if you will that is looking around and may have a weapon in their hand, or the one in jeans and tee shirt not paying attention to anything?

THINK!  They don't need someone to turn them on, because they are on the hunt because their sick mind tells them to go and find someone to satisfy their need.

If they are on the hunt for a young girl or boy they are going to seek the one that is the easiest to take down or manipulate.  Its the need that drives them - not the dress.  Its the sick urge, and if you are going to commit a crime you tend to be selective regarding opportunity with the less risk.

If the burka covered woman looks easier compared to the hot dressed slut?  GUESS who they will stalk first?

If you seriously think that a HUGELY modest woman in a 'little house on the prairie' dress and a whore were in the room together - and they had a choice?  Don't kid yourself into thinking that the possibility of taking a virgin wouldn't be a turn on.

Modesty is a completely different issue

Now I don't agree with either of the personalities in the video totally.  I think both of them are bit extreme to a point.  I mean lets face it neither did a good job on the subject.   The program just made me angry for some reason.  Sigh.

There is no doubt just like men there are ladies that go out to find sex.  That's a no brainer. 

To stereotype people stating if they dress just so they are looking for sex?  That is a huge stretch.  Heck even if they were that doesn't justify forcing someone.

That is like saying, 'She was out there just for the raping!"  If someone states that is what comes to mind?  They seriously need some help badly.

There is a difference between 'looking' and 'gawking'.  There is no doubt some men will look at women, but to say they can justify the gawking and raping afterwards?  

They have choices just like everyone does.  They can do the responsible thing, or they can act like a sick puppy.  There is no middle ground.

The fact that little children get raped?  We don't tell them their spongebob tee shirt CAUSED it do we?  Remember those sick puppies are attracted to children, and they did nothing but BE A CHILD!

Its the same thing with any rapist.  They did nothing, but were at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Its sad to me that some men and ladies actually buy into the fact that 'dress' has anything to do with rape.  People that rape have a sick mind, and need help.

Modesty is something that God asks for all of us.  Its also so much more than just dress.

People that make excuses - or even HINT at excuses for rapists are sinning.

Don't blah blah blah about personal responsibility if you can't allow the rapist to own the whole enchilada as well.   You are in fact allowing them to take some off their plates.

People wonder WHY we are losing our moral compass?  Hmm.  Maybe we blur the lines to much, and let sick criminals off with some strange idea they need to only owe a certain percentage of the blame. I mean you imagine the relief?  COOL I only OWN 98% so its STILL THEIR FAULT!  Remember the sick mind here!  They have no problem justifying themselves with as little as 2%!

Don't kid yourselves.  There are many MANY circumstances in which modesty won't stop rape if that rapist wants it to happen.

I don't think MOST of us would be 'okay' with any dress for our children. My child is 17 and she knows the line in the sand, and she is okay with it.  She knows what God expects of her.

I will not justify the lack of modesty today.  I think most are bothered by it.  SOME are more extreme than others.  That's fine.

Sending out the message to rapists that you are going to give them excuses for their sick behavior?  That is where I draw the line.

I mean HELLO what kind of message are sending these sickos???

I know men - of the faith and not of the faith - that wouldn't do such a thing even if a naked person walked right up and offered.

I hate to admit it, but I'm sure even the men that love to use that excuse wouldn't even 'go for it' if they themselves had any moral standards at all.

Our culture has allowed to many excuses, and to many percentages to spread the it around.  We don't let people own their sin 100% anymore.  We are to busy looking to see WHAT someone else did.

Are their REASONS these people rape?  Yes.  Do we want truth or we do we want to just pass the blame along instead of facing reality.

It's strange how we are able to rationalize the unjust behavior of third world countries, and their treatment of rape victims.  They treat them as criminals.  We have all read the stories of women covered head to toe with black cloth, and their ankles that may have shown were reason enough.  That children that were tempted from their yard with candy.  That little boys are taught that their mothers are worth less than their live stock.

YET here we are in our part of the world, and don't you know those third world men would agree with our excuses.  They say ankles are a good excuse, and we say 'short dresses'.

WOW aren't we more civilized.


We just don't wish to acknowledge modesty and sexual abuse are completely different subjects.  I mean if we could?  We might not have any good excuse left.

The bible states we are to avoid temptations.   If we blow it?  We are to own our sins, and not tell God:

We need to discuss percentages here!

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Waneta Dawn on 11:24 AM said...

The odd thing about this clip is that rape is not about sex or sexual desire. It is about power. Rapists are looking for someone to overpower. If they are men, often they want to lash out at women, to teach them a lesson.

Although I do agree that women should be modestly dressed, and have at times noticed that women were dressed in order to "get laid," at no time are these women desiring to be raped. They are looking for an agreeable, pleasant encounter, not a violent one. Provocative dress is not aimed at inviting just any sexual encounter.

Men who rape women do so because of anger/revenge issues and of a desire to overpower a woman, not because she turned him on. Rape happens in the dead of winter when women are fully covered, including in a heavy winter coat.

Another way of looking at this to to note that our society does not blame men for being mugged. We don't ask the mugged man how he was dressed, and we don't blame him for owning an expensive care or for wearing an expensive suit, shoes and watch, or claim that by dressing thus, he was looking to be mugged. Nor do we blame him for walking late at night, although we may think him irresponsible for walking in a violent neighborhood, we still would not attack him for how he was wealthily dressed.

This whole thing is more about society's disrespect of women, and of blaming women for most things that go wrong. After all, if men can hold women responsible for the behavior of men, then men are free to act however they want, commit any crimes they want, and truly be in charge, in power, and have things their way. Both on the personal level and at the societal level it is about maintaining power over women and children.

Anonymous said...

I didn't watch the videos above and therefore probably not comment and I would never agree that a person dressing provocatively is "asking" to be raped. But this isn't limited to the crime of rape. My car insurance company will not make a payout for things stolen from my vehicle if I did not have it locked. We consider someone a fool for not having their house locked against would-be thieves, murderers or rapists. The old public service announcement was "Lock up your valuables and keep an honest boy, honest." We do blame victims of muggings for not keeping their wallets in their front pockets. A woman is supposed to carry her purse wrapped over her body. Was the victim paying attention? Why were they walking alone? Why didn't he put that Rolex watch in his pocket? You shouldn't park your expensive car in that neighborhood because you're just asking for it to be stolen or stripped down. As a society we have sacrificed ourselves to willingly submit to invasive TSA searches to prevent terrorism. If
we didn't have the security we would have ourselves to blame. When terrorism
occurs anyway, we blame a breakdown of security.

Anonymous said...

I also didn't watch the video... The problem with comparing a provocatively dressed woman with an unlocked car is that it isn't always the case.
In this post, it was pointed out that to the rapist, it is the modestly dressed woman (maybe in a burqa), or the child, or the elderly woman, who represents the unlocked car.
A rapist might even see it as this: modest dress = innocence = easy.

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