Thursday, September 10, 2009

Chris Brown - We are FRIENDS now

Posted by Hannah at 11:44 AM

We are going to take a look at part four of the Larry King interview with Chris Brown. This is part three of our series WE are FRIENDS now!

Part One Chris Brown, Mom and Denial...

Part Two Chris Brown Abuse NEVER happened before!

Part Four Chris Brown I'm NOT a monster!



He mentions how when they went to his friend's house after the domestic violence situation it wasn't to 'rekindle the relationship', but to build the 'friendship' back up. It was like Romeo and Juliet trying to get together as they were kept apart. Huh?

How many healthy people in the world would wish to rekindle their friendship after someone beats the living snot out of them...and NOT talk about what happened during that time? How they are just there to 'relax', and just be friends. LOL How you just get together JUST for that, and not feel just a bit awkward? He claims it wasn't at all! Reasonable people would feel awkward don't you think?

WHY DID YOU DO THAT?

She never asked WHY he beat her up, and he never mentioned it due to him 'not remembering it'. He claims they didn't want the pressure of that conversation! They just wanted to relax, and what?? lol play like nothing ever happened?

People that are abusive that realize there is a chance they can't get the relationship back on track to where they want it will attempt the 'can we be friends?"

Part of relationships is resolution after disagreements.

He beat her up, and yet he claims she never asked him WHY he hurt her? I guess he never felt the need to tell her either.

Part of the reason you don't go into these parts of discussions with abusers is they get very defensive. That's to close for comfort for them, and when you think about it ... it isn't a communication problem at all. Its a resolution one!

They don't wish to go into detail, and if they said they were sorry don't push it.

If you decide you can't be friends? WELL you can't forgive and all you want to do is hate! THEY will of course forgive you as many times as possible, but since you are unable you will be the problem.

It goes back to you need to own part of the issue I hit you to begin with. If you aren't going to be my lover you need to be my friend! If you can't be my friend...they will TURN on you!

ALWAYS A SENSE OF URGENCY

There is always a sense of urgency. You can't have time to think about it. To the abuser there is nothing to think about. YOU must decide instantly or they have made up their minds about you.

ill change urgent


Abusers don't like that wiggle room, because its easier to break you down if you give in to the sense of urgency. They can also point out how you can't be all that sincere about the 'friend' part if question anything in the future. Its a tool they use to get you back, and they can STILL have some sense of control.

They can't do this 'change' without YOU! The real reason? They don't want to, and they WON'T if you don't give in to them in many cases. They aren't doing it to better themselves they are doing it so you will mellow out! They can show the world they are doing something, and I'm a nice guy since she will be my FRIEND see?

If you don't help there are threats of maybe 'killing themselves' or hurting others. The threats come out about how they will TAKE everything from you, and spread falsehoods about you. They will take you court over everything, and threaten to get custody of the children.

You do it their way and be friends...or you will pay the consequences! That is a very REAL dynamic, and if you don't have a good support system? All kinds of things will happen. They could go back due to fear, or play the REAL dance of that REAL abuser!

DO YOU EVER THINK SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOU??

Chris Brown thinks there is nothing WRONG with him, because he just made a mistake. He can 'change'. Why do you 'change' if nothing is wrong with you?

You can see clearly he doesn't wish to OWN that root within him that can be downright evil! That doesn't MEAN you are 100% evil - it means you have a part of you that can be!

You can't change anything if you can't OWN that about yourself! Think about it! Does a person that has a addiction NOT admit they are addicted and 'change' despite the fact they won't admit it? Can a person that gets 10 speeding tickets NOT admit he drives to fast?

I will give the man credit that he WANTS to learn about himself, and LEARN different ways to react to things. He wants to become a 'REAL' man as he worded it! I pray that he does! He has alot of work to do!

What doesn't help? His mother can't place any pieces together at all. Her denial isn't going to help his healing. She had to see things as well, and in real life like you and I live in? That person is going to help make OUR lifes miserable. You can't help yourself or anyone else if you can't admit things.

Can you truly be friends? Can you say it would be a safe thing to do at this point? They truly don't have the tools to do that, and victims normally can't deal with that in a healthy manner either. Resolution can bring healing, but what if that person is incapable...but insists on friendship? Do you seriously think that can be rock solid? If so FRIENDS who are we really kidding!

Part One Chris Brown, Mom and Denial...

Part Two Chris Brown Abuse NEVER happened before!

Part Four Chris Brown I'm NOT a monster!


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