Commandments of Men had a discussion on "Love is an Choice". I think we can agree with how some people use that phrase, and others frankly use it as a tool of manipulation and guilt.
I don't deny that a part of loving is a choice, but it must be emphasized that it is indeed only a part of the larger equation. Love, itself, isn't really a choice at all. To ACT upon it, or to ACT in a loving manner even when devoid of emotion and feelings of love, is a choice - not love in and of itself. Love, in and of itself, is only a verb in a portion of it's meaning. TO love is a verb. I'm afraid the phrase "love is a choice" ultimately devalues the emotional aspect and power of love, and I don't believe for a second that this is something God wants. It also makes for the fodder of warfare for authoritarian types. My ex, for instance, was coerced into believing that she'd made a "choice" to love me, a choice which she could "correct".A Wife's Submission, Charis wrote a piece called, I am weak.
It starts with:
I am weak.and ends with:
I can’t bear the name-calling
toward the children
Joey is not a “wuz”
Timmy is not an “idiot”
Sarah is not “retarded”
Susy is not “lazy”
I am not a “bitch”
I am weakNow go read the middle part - its very good!
“if ______ causes you to stumble, cut it off!”
I will cut off the head that causes me to stumble
and move forward by myself, but not alone
I will no longer partake of the deceptive fruit and follow Adam out of the garden
I choose to live in freedom and victory
walking with the Lord in the cool of the day
I am weak
But He is strong
Shirley Taylor video from the Seneca Falls 2 Evangelical Women's Rights Convention. She establishes why addressing the problematic Danvers Statement is relevant today and the far reaching effects it has had on Christian thought and doctrine.
Wade Burleson is writing again. Who has authority in marriage? The husband or the wife?
I have to say I enjoyed not only the article but the comments as well. The article stemmed from a comment left on John McArthur's blog, and went unanswered. Below is the comment in question:
"I am concerned about a marriage situation in which the husband is a ob/gyn doctor. He believes they should not use birth control and delivers all their children at home. She is exhausted with the load of the continual pregnancies and the little ones. He is not willing to allow her to have outside help in the home. She would like to be able to limit the pregnancies. He rules! She submits. How does this fit in with God's balance of the man loving the woman? What are her options in this type of marriage? How can she disagree and be biblically correct? Any insights on this? I would love to hear them.Internet Monk wrote, "Why I am an "Egalitarian""
Complementarians would thus limit opportunities available to women for Christian vocation, particularly those of ordained, pastoral, or authoritative teaching ministries in the church.I would encourage you to go and read the list, and the interesting comments.
I humbly disagree. In my view, complementarians misread the creation narratives, ignore one of the great consequences of the fall, neglect to appreciate the significant role of women in the Biblical story who subvert man-made authority systems to cooperate with God in bringing to pass his redemptive plan, fail to grasp the significance of Pentecost and the nature of the new creation community in Christ, and misread NT passages that restrict women as universal rules.
My own position has been called “egalitarian” (though I dislike the term). I believe the ideal situation is full partnership of men and women in the service of God’s Kingdom. I do not believe that strong role distinctions were part of God’s creative plan. Though men and women certainly do complement each other in many ways, are not identical, and do have some different tasks unique to their respective sexes that they are to fulfill in life, these differences do not indicate universal hard and fast “authority” and “role” structures.
If you looking for support there is a online board called, Our Place. It people - both men and women - from all walks of life, and different parts of the world. They have a section just for the faith portion of domestic violence, and of course the main portion of the board. They do an email verification for members, so check your spam folders! If your abuser checks your email get a free one at yahoo for example that they don't know about.
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