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| Love is a verb. Love is an action word! |
It seems to me its like the debate over roles! Are biblical roles God given, or are they a 'feeling' as some describe them ... but say they aren't?!
I was watching a debate between some ladies and gentlemen from both the Egalitarian and the Complementarianism sides of the issue in regards to roles, and of course submission was a very hot topic. From where I sat there were couples on both sides that have very good marriages. They respect and love their spouses, but it seems like words like 'leader' makes the whole conversation go into a tailspin!
What is strange is both claim they appreciate differences within couples, and their gifts that they bring to the marriage. There was a gentleman that admitted he wants his wife to take the lead in some circumstances due to her gifts that she has in that area. To me he was showing LOVE as an action word! It showed respect for this gift she had, and he willingly admitted he did not! They both use their gifts for the benefit of each other. Then you have a complementary woman that stated she also respected gifts and individuality, but went on some speech about pretty much the opposite. How she was taking his ROLE as leader, and making herself HEAD. How can you respect differences, and then rail against them?
ROLES ARE A FEELING!
It would seem to me that maybe they need to change their viewpoint! How about ROLES are a feeling! For some reason they claim God has given this ROLE to men, and for some strange reason they say that women can TAKE what God has blessed them with! Is that possible? Can women TAKE what God GAVE to someone?
I don't think anyone would discourage someone that has a true gift, but is it possible for that gift to disappear after God blessed them with it? Its like saying if you are a great artist, but because someone took your paints and canvas away you no longer are. Your gift for art is taken away. You can only be an artist if you have paints and canvas, because the gifts are only present when the supplies are.
Do we honestly think that God would tell the husband to lead and then not give him the wisdom and qualities that he needs to do that?
If the husband as the wisdom and qualities in order to lead as this woman said? How could it be taken away from him? Today you hear all kinds of excuses on HOW this wisdom and qualities of men are stripped from them. In the case of the Egalitarian man I spoke of?
I never said that I wasn't a leader, just that I know when to follow as well.
If he allows his wife to take the lead in some areas of their life it doesn't mean he isn't a leader. She maybe the stronger in that area. There are circumstances in life that make it lopsided, and if you have a partner that has that gift to balance it out to make it better? A good leader can see that, and will take the opportunity to use that gift he was blessed to have in his wife. Not having the same gifts doesn't make him LESS of a leader! A good leader uses the gifts that are available at his disposal, and that could be in all kinds of areas.
To me that is wise way of leading! The response to this view shows some just aren't willing to hear!
So are we to ignore the verses that speak to husbands and wives because it seems to work when we ignore them and do what we want?Or are we to assume that God knows best and incorporate His teachings in our marriage no matter what we ourselves want and think?I guess leadership isn't an action, but a feeling! Being HEAD in this mindset seems to be as well. ROLES aren't God given if they can be taken away via your spouse! Its the same thing as telling an artist they aren't artistic when you take away their paint supplies.
Is a wife to ignore what God says to her because her husband doesn't seem to mind if she leads and is the head? Or is she to stay in her role and allow God to work on him so that he reaches his potential as the husband?
I've heard so many women say that they have to lead because their husband wont. The truth is often that their husbands wont lead in exactly the way that the wives want them to, so they take over. That just isn't right. Its a very common scenario.
I do believe love can come in many forms. You can feel the love from another, and you can show love in an action.
Roles it seems? Roles are a feeling!
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