Adventures in Missing The Point

Mary Kassian is twisting and turning the truth once again to make her point.  Does she really make it in a honestly and upfront way?  Not so much. 

In fact she completely misses the point, but pretends she knows was the point was.  You don’t have to like all of the presentation of a message in order to ‘grasp’ the concept of the message.  In Mary’s reality unless it is dished up in her flavor she seems to ignore it.  Here is the article. 

Rape is a crime of opportunity or at times even a means of shame (not to say there aren’t other reasons).  Adults and children get sexual assaulted all the time sadly. 

This story started innocently enough on a college campus when a police officer was asked to come and give a talk about rape prevention, risk management, etc.   These things will help you recognize ways to lesson your chances of being attacked, but will not guarantee it.

Dress is cultural myth that society uses to blame others for being raped.  Majority of these cases are NOT people that were dressed in the way that society seems to hint at.  This myth has been proven false, but this culture has a hard accepting it.  Repeating it and using dress encourages the continual use of the myth, instead of dealing with the proven issues.

The police officer in question decided to use this myth during his presentation – even after being taught and instructed not to.  He informed the crowd if they were stop dressing like sluts they wouldn’t get raped.  The after effect of his words started the march all over the globe to bring awareness to others. 

They used the word ‘slut’ because of the police officer using it.  I’m sure many did not like the presentation due to the wording, and the fact that some showed up dressing the part on purpose.  This march started organically as news spread of the officer’s insulting ignorance. 

Keep in mind when you read about sexual assaults on men or women in the news the clothing myth is not prevalent in the facts of the case. That should clue society in, but sadly it doesn’t seem to sink in for whatever reason.  Here is a RAINN article about different types of sexual assault.

Slutwalk

(from now on will be called s*utwalk)

The first S*utWalk demonstration took place in Toronto, Canada, on April 3, 2011. The rally was held in response to a Toronto police officer's statement that young women could help safeguard themselves against rape by dressing more modestly.

Is that what Officer Michael Sanguinetti said when doing a talk about personal safety on a campus in Canada?  Nope. 

"You know, I think we're beating around the bush here," Michael Sanguinetti began, blandly enough, as he addressed the 10 students who turned up for the pep talk. Then he said: "I've been told I'm not supposed to say this – however, women should avoid dressing like sl*ts in order not to be victimised."

It’s a myth that people get raped due to what they are wearing.  That is why people were so upset.  The officer knew he wasn’t suppose to say what he did, and he said it anyway.   If it were fact this would be universal. 

If Mary Kassian wants to encourage people not to be ‘man haters’ than stop telling them they are benevolent towards women as long as you are modest.   That is just pure ignorance.

Men and women – boys and girls get raped NOT due to dress.  How often do we hear about break ins where the family is terrorized?  In wartime how often do we hear about people being raped as well?  Their dress had nothing to do with it.  Those types of circumstances are MORE prevalent than Mary Kassian’s agenda against women that aren’t like minded.

Purpose of S*utwalk

Mary Kassian states their purpose was:

Barnett organized a protest march to the Toronto Police Station, which she dubbed "S#utWalk." Through it, she hoped to raise society's collective consciousness, and to encourage girls to:

• "reclaim" the word "s#ut" and other such negative male-defined labels,
• exert their right to reject male-defined, patriarchal norms of female dress and behavior, and
• protest a culture that puts blame on the victims of sexual assault.

Shall we look at what the organizers said?

Their goal: to shift the paradigm of mainstream rape culture, which they believe focuses on analyzing the behavior of the victim rather than that of the perpetrator.

As it should be. 
Rape – as we know – is common in prison for example.  Do the orange jumpsuits tease prisoners?  I doubt one person said that the orange jumpsuit made them lust in that fashion.  From what I understand rape is used a form of revenge in prison most of the time.  The motive of the rapist wasn’t dress and was planned, and yet the culture doesn’t really go into that.  Why?

We all know that in the Middle East women in burka’s get raped as well.  That society is very patriarchal, and yet we know it happens on a regular basis.  It was in the last couple of years that a high ranking Muslim leader from the middle east spoke about how women ‘spurred’ men to rape.  The burka wasn’t enough if they still see their ankles. 

One of the original organizers that was ‘incensed’ by the statement of the police officer was raped in a hallway as a child wearing a winter coat and boots after coming in from outside.  Her story and many like them are more common and prevalent of rape.

To that end, S#utWalkers sport T-shirts and signs with slogans like, "S*uts pay Taxes," or "I'm Proud to be a S*ut." Many protesters dress provocatively, in skimpy leather thongs, bras, skank-boots, and fishnet stockings, paint the word "s*ut" on their bare skin, or skate around on inline skates in lingerie. Their male supporters wear shirts that read, "I Love S#uts!" The message is that it's misogynistic when men categorize women as s#uts, but it's empowering when women define themselves as such. Women have the right to be as s#utty as they want to be.

Did the organizers ask women to show up dressed as they did?  No.  From the interviews you read that part took them by surprise.  

If you read enough regarding  this particular march she speaks of, MOST did NOT dress as she describes (see picture).  YES, there were some of course.  The media is going to use them, because lets face it – it sells!  When you have a large gathering of this nature you will get all kinds.    Their dress was their way of getting the point across, and others used other avenues.   

When you refuse to look past the dress of some to grasp the TRUE point of the rally itself?  Don’t be surprised when people think you are a bit uppity as you scrape your nose across the ceiling okay?  Sigh.  The message – no matter how ugly Mary feels the presentation – was about how most that get raped aren’t dressed like s*uts.  How this is a cultural myth that has been proven so.

Mary Kassian is once again applying her agenda to the s*utwalk, and yet she clearly didn’t read anything close to what she claims they stand for.

“Not everyone has to chant ‘I’m a s*ut and I’m proud,’” said Conners. “No matter how you identify, even if you don’t consider yourself a sexual person, we’d like to have anyone who is supportive of creating a more positive environment for women and believes that rape shouldn’t be permitted.”
S#utWalk organizers, both domestically and internationally, hope that the movement creates a global dialogue in which women feel comfortable discussing sexual assault without fear of blame.
“By starting this walk and talking to my friends about whether they want to help me, I’ve learned stories from my friends where I didn’t know that they had been sexually assaulted before,” said Lena Ellis, the organizer of S#utWalk Detroit. “This serves as an outlet and lets them have a voice. Having my friends open up is a big deal, and if this happens in my little circle, it can happen for a lot of other people as well.”

I will admit I’m sure Mary was bothered by the dress, and some that chanted strange things. This is NOT the first time this myth has been discussed, and yet we have to once again debate this to death. 

It reminds me of people that are so prideful that they must talk over you – even knowing they are wrong – just to drown you out.   They refuse and will not acknowledge that some people have sick minds, and rape because of that.

I have had the pleasure of working with police, and have read plenty of statements from police on faith boards that do NOT condone this myth.  The next thing you know people will bring up extreme stories about females throwing themselves at men to prove their points.  You have to ask those people in return WOULD they rape if that happened in their presence?  Why wouldn’t they rape?

S#utWalk ideology puts the entire onus for sexual conduct on the guys. It teaches girls that they don't need to manage risk. It encourages foolish behavior.  It implies that a girl can dress provocatively, go to a guy's apartment, get drunk, get naked, pole dance, come on to him, and then accuse him of rape when he doesn't stop at the last minute. C'mon girls. Use your brains. Yes, he may be culpable of rape, but you sure didn't do yourself any favors by throwing your car doors open. If you're wise, you'll put up boundaries to safeguard yourself against the risk of unwanted sexual attention and not put yourself in risky situations.

Don’t you love how she talks down to her readers?  Mary Kassian feels that her readers need to use their brains, and stop pole dancing, etc.   (See I can twist too!  )  No where did they speak of NOT managing risk, and to encourage ‘foolish behavior’.  Mary Kassian’s implications sadly came from her own tunnel vision. 

What is not discussed and SHOULD BE is wise people do put up boundaries, and sadly still get raped.  The majority of women and children that are raped aren’t stupid, and DID put up boundaries.  Rape is not about dress, lack of modesty, etc. 

Don't misunderstand me. Women who are sexually abused are NOT at fault. A crime is a crime. But there are sometimes things that girls can do to lesson their vulnerability.

Rape is NOT about Sex

Yeah Okay Mary.  Could it be that the s#utwalks participates realize this also? Of course not.  We need you telling people to use their brains before they realize it.

2. It equates sex with power:

S#utWalk buys into Third Wave feminist ideology that sex is power. It preaches that sex is ultimately the way a girl exerts and expresses her freedom and equality. It intimates that s#utty women are powerful women. If a girl wants more power, then she'll throw off male-defined Judeo-Christian notions about sex. Sadly, I see the carnage of this attitude in multitudes of today's young women -even those who are Christians. Power is not the right to do what you want, nor to act in a sensual, promiscuous, immoral way. True power is "the might to do what's right"-It's the backbone and strength to walk in the way of the Lord.

Sadly, she shows that she has jaded lenses on.  You ever notice everything goes back to the Third Wave Feminist Ideology?  Next, that leads to homosexuality?  The theories always land on homosexuality after they get done railing against the feminist.  Ever notice that?

I think we all know – and can see – that society in general has a very promiscuous attitude towards sexual relations.   What Mary Kassian and others like her seem to miss is that there are loads of people that don’t share that attitude.  She speaks as if she realizes whom she is talking to, and yet reminds them of things as if they were children.  I just don’t get the appeal personally.

I gotta admit I had a hard time writing this post. Though the post called for it, I don't like using the word "s#ut." I think it's crass, crude, and inappropriate.  Since when is being ill-mannered and potty-mouthed a mark of personal empowerment? S#utWalk would have us believe it is.

I have to admit I didn’t like the name either, but I grasped the point.  It wasn’t hard,  but sadly it went right over Mary Kassian’s head.  At least that is what she is eluding to.  Does she have a brain?  I sure she does, so why the deception when she knows that isn’t what they would have you ‘believe it is’?

What started out as two women wanting to protest thinking their group of friends would join them ended up as something MUCH larger.  It didn’t end up that big because people wanted to be potty mouth to show personal empowerment.  It was to protest against the ignorance of that officer’s statement, and how this myth carries on to hurt people. 

S#utWalk blames the problem of sexual abuse on patriarchy. It buys into the feminist mindset that throughout history men have been on a misogynistic power trip, and part of a massive subversive patriarchal plot to oppress women. Men are bad. Women are good. Get rid of male privilege and you'll get rid of the problem.

(giggles) Ah no.  I don’t think the men would be at the protest if women were screaming – or implying – men are bad.  Seriously?!

Well guess what?  Women can be bad too. Female to male domestic violence is statistically just as prevalent as male to female. And the feminist argument that women act this way because of the patriarchal system is simply not true.

This is the statement that put me over the top.  I have never read that women act abusive towards men due to patriarchal systems.  That’s just dumb.  Heck the article she linked doesn’t even say that.
Do I believe that Patriarchy causes domestic violence?  Nope. 

Can people use the patriarchy concept as an excuse to Lord over others, and then abuse them?  Heck even CBMW will admit that.  Human Nature will twist a concept as means to their end.  (Heck, Mary is doing the same with her article.) 

If you look real close?  It’s a concept Mary and others will admit (lording over to abuse), but do their darnest to not truly deal with it.  If they placed as much energy on that as opposed to their hatred of extreme feminists?  How much better would it be.  We are called to love, encourage, and help those less fortunate.   Some will accept that help, and others will reject it.  The bible doesn’t say if they reject it please vilify them in return.

Yes, due to the mechanics of male-female plumbing, women are raped more than men. Rape is a horrible wrong. But at its core, the problem isn't maleness or men. It's sin. Some men are oppressors.  But many are decent, honorable guys who'll throw themselves on a sword to protect the ones they love. It's high time we stopped swallowing the lie that the male sex is responsible for all the world's ills.

Here we have another twist.  I watched a documentary – In Her Own Words it was called – about Gloria Steinem.  One person she dearly loved was her father.  She would never say her father was an oppressor.  She speaks about attitudes – cultural beliefs – towards women.  Those that are wrong, and can be oppressive when taken to the extreme.  It wasn’t about the male sex being responsible for all the world’s ills.  That is called a generalization, and talk about throwing out lies.  WOW!  That’s a huge hum dinger of one!

Everyone knows there are man haters, and we also know there are women haters as well.  The majority of society are NOT haters of this type, and we need to stop swallowing the lies that people like Mary Kassian feed to others that encourages this ‘us against them’ attitude.  Its arrogance.  Its also unchristian.

The March wasn’t about: Its okay to be a slut

S#utWalk wants girls to stop feeling shame. A girl should be able to act trashy without feeling trashy about the way she acts. A S#utwalk Organizer explains:
"The event is in protest of a culture that we think is too permissive when it comes to rape and sexual assault," said Siobhan Connors, 20, of Lynn, Massachusetts, another Boston organizer. "It's to bring awareness to the shame and degradation women still face for expressing their sexuality ... essentially for behaving in a healthy and sexual way."
Okay, let me get this straight. S#utWalk thinks that we live in a culture that's too permissive with regards to men forcing women to have sex. But it also thinks that it's healthy for women to be sexually permissive. Whoa. Now there's some fancy mental gymnastics! How-pray tell-does the idea that it's healthy for women to sleep around outside of marrige detract guys from pressuring, coercing, or forcing them to do so? Surely, if it's healthy for girls to sleep around, then it logically follows that it's healthy for guys to expect girls to engage in that type of behavior. It fosters the mentality, "Of course you want it! All girls want it!  It's good for you!"
Sexual violence is a horrific sin. But S#utWalk isn't helping matters any. Sadly, I think it's just shooting women in the foot. It's creating a mindset and culture that exacerbates the very problem it says it wants to solve.

Since when is rape ‘pressuring and coercing’?  Last time I checked it was force.  The walk wasn’t about being able to act and feel trashy either.  It seems you like the some secular gymnastics as well there MARY!  They said the attitude towards rape is too permissive when it comes to rape and sexual assault.   You see you don’t have to ‘agree’ with all parts of the person’s opinion in order to ‘grasp the overall point’.  As you told your readers?  Please use your brain!

The officer who made the comments, Constable Michael Sanguinetti, was disciplined but remains on duty, Toronto police spokesman Mark Pugash said Thursday.
"We said at the time that his comments were entirely unacceptable, that they didn't reflect in any way what we train and teach our people," Pugash said.

This is another portion of what the protest was about.  You don’t encourage the myth that you get raped because we feel you dressed like a s#ut.  That is NOT to say you don’t use ‘boundaries’ to keep you safe no matter HOW you are dressed.  There are reasons people do NOT train and teach their people to even bring it up. 

The idea that women’s clothing has some bearing on whether they will be raped is a dangerous myth feminists have tried to debunk for decades. Despite all the activism and research, however, the cultural misconception prevails. After an 11-year-old girl in Texas was gang-raped, the New York Times ran a widely criticized story this spring that included a description of how the girl dressed “older than her age” and wore makeup — as if either was relevant to the culpability of the 18 men accused of raping her. In Scotland, one secondary school is calling for uniforms to be baggier and longer in an attempt to dissuade pedophiles.

‘The cultural misconception prevails’ was the true purpose of the walk no matter how much you wish to twist it.  Stating that rape is sin, and then stating your dress doesn’t help NOT because men are animals but due to immodesty on your part …..is just plain stupid.

I don’t agree with all the statements or opinions of the men and women at the s#ut walks, but I was able to see pass all that to grasp the point.  Rape has nothing to do with dress, and it was dangerous, crude and inappropriate for the officer that was there to talk about personal safety to even hint at it.   That point was completely loss on Mary Kassian’s piece that encourages fear and hate towards those that aren’t like minded. 

We are feminist haters – hear us roar!  They couldn’t have a point to save their lifes!  We refuse to listen!

Yep.  That seems to be more accurate.

It’s a cultural belief that rape is caused by dress.  Sadly, men and women get raped in this world.  It makes sense that officer comes to a college campus to teach some self protection, risk management tactics to students.  Some I’m sure they knew, and others they learned that day.  Listen to interviews of rapists, or read articles about the interviews.  You will find they looked for opportunity – not dress.

The bible does ask for modesty, but not just for dress but of heart.  Mary is so offended by the presentation of the message, and yet if you think about Jesus having dined with outcasts of his time does she seriously think they acted properly 100%?  I have no doubt some attempted to push it just to see what would happen.  If he got insulted and used this ‘us against them’ attitude – then stormed out to tell the world what they really think – instead of what they said…how different would things be

• Rape myths discourage survivors from reporting the crime.
  Rape myths minimize the experiences of survivors.
  Rape myths discourage survivors from seeking therapy.
  Rape myths justify the actions of perpetrators.
  Rape myths incorrectly place blame on survivors.
  Rape myths reinforce stereotypes about who is victimized and who perpetrates.

Its sad to see someone that claims Christianity living in such a bitter reality of their own making.  To coin the statement from Mary herself, ‘C'mon girl. Use your brain.’  This isn’t about feminists, and what you feel they think – its about rape myths.  Dah.

Mary Kassian and the staff of CBMW and TrueWoman: Retract and apologize for "Five Problems with the Slutwalk Marches"  Change.org has published an article about Mary Kassian’s viewpoint, and have asked for support.  Somehow I think they will be ignored, because they would be considered (grasp) feminists.   To quote:

The problems with this article go beyond bad writing and misinformation. There is such a vast wealth of resources and information out there concerning the causes and prevention of sexual violence that to write this post based on myths, misconceptions, and shaky impressions was just lazy. Further, the lack of research in this article reveals a disrespect to survivors of rape. It reinforces uninformed myths about the causes of rape and blames women for being survivors of this violent crime. To publish this kind of writing discredits these sites immensely, and speaks ill of the quality of the writers they endorse. This blog post needs to be retracted immediately, with full apology from its author, and replaced with a writing that gives due respect and compassion to survivors of rape and intimate partner violence.

Additional Articles:

S#utwalks Sweep the Nation
SlutWalking gets rolling after cop's loose talk about provocative clothing
SlutWalks and the future of feminism
Slutwalk
Men in India doing the slutwalk (video)

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