tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10948559.post978811458525199809..comments2024-02-08T21:51:21.368-06:00Comments on Emotional Abuse and Your Faith: You can stop the fights. It is very simple. You stop fighting with him.Hannahhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15165967476661656865noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10948559.post-7576583770795221522011-11-03T21:01:45.380-05:002011-11-03T21:01:45.380-05:00And the further away you can get when you walk awa...And the further away you can get when you walk away, the better, preferrably one or two states away!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10948559.post-55122860289630809712008-05-05T07:29:00.000-05:002008-05-05T07:29:00.000-05:00I'm glad that you can walk away. I can see how yo...I'm glad that you can walk away. I can see how you would feel better as well! People do think that will change the other person's reaction, but you are correct it doesn't stop it at all.<BR/><BR/>I have had letters of people being followed, and not allowed to walk away due to force of some kind. I'm sure some people would be able to shut down completely in that sense, but others would really struggle with it.<BR/><BR/>I as well tend to walk away as you do.Hannahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15165967476661656865noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10948559.post-29817424520186733602008-05-04T16:38:00.000-05:002008-05-04T16:38:00.000-05:00In my verbally abusive marriage, I changed how I r...In my verbally abusive marriage, I changed how I responded to him. I stopped all even marginally abusive behavior and his abuse of me got worse! <BR/><BR/>Nonetheless, it is good to learn walk away from verbal abuse and not engage.It has really helped me feel better.jenniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05373121865782897369noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10948559.post-1688790073035683232008-04-07T16:37:00.000-05:002008-04-07T16:37:00.000-05:00Thank you for letting us know! We will come and r...Thank you for letting us know! We will come and read it!Hannahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15165967476661656865noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10948559.post-33332085213990573122008-04-06T08:54:00.000-05:002008-04-06T08:54:00.000-05:00That's very interesting. I guess you are correct ...That's very interesting. I guess you are correct - it is blame shifting as well.<BR/><BR/>Reactive Abuse to me is mininized to much. I got a letter once and her spouse was following her around and kept up the pressure. There was no where to run! He just pounding away at her! He got to the point he was in her face, and must have said something that finally broke her! She slapped him in attempt for him to get out of her face, and I would assume in reaction to what he said.<BR/><BR/>The whole focus of her counsel was on her slap. SURE it was mentioned that he wasn't on his best behavior, but her SLAP? Their reaction to her you would think that was the worse part of the day!<BR/><BR/>They told her she was now abusive as well. Personally, I think abusive behavior is a pattern of behavior. If the pattern isn't there - to me she reacted more than abused. I'm not justifying slapping, but to me there is a HUGE difference!<BR/><BR/>They also - as you mentioned - blame shifted in the example as well. How it started didn't matter - how she ended it was the focus of the discussion.Hannahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15165967476661656865noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10948559.post-47231473688893683122008-04-05T14:27:00.000-05:002008-04-05T14:27:00.000-05:00Interesting. I just posted on 'blame-shifting' whi...Interesting. I just posted on 'blame-shifting' which is what this is, in essence. To blame the abused for the abuse is to continue - contribute to - the abuse.Jeannette Alteshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06574051760314762024noreply@blogger.com